Give Tori Spelling A Makeover

I just spent the last two minutes engaged in one of my favorite mental exercises from the early 90s: giving Tori Spelling an imaginary makeover. I mean, she has pretty eyes and some nice cheek bones, so why has she always insisted on harsh colors and lines?

Other than making her eat some lasagna*, what would you recommend for poor Tori?

Photo: Socialite Life

Utterly unrelated to Tori, but was I the only one horrified by Crown Princess Letizia of Spain's emaciated look last weekend? She's barely recognizable in this closeup.